Day 13: June 19, 2019

The drama of the ER continued yesterday morning as Justin and Oliver were still there in the hospital. Many tests were run during the night, and none of us got much sleep, if any. Justin won the award for least amount of sleep in ZERO! Many props to him for winning dad of the year award. Essentially what they found in the ER was basically no white blood cell count; however, could not find an infection and he didn't have a fever. So they were basically keeping him there to monitor and give him fluids as well as antibiotics (to treat what was presumed to be an infection due to the low white blood cell count).


Poppy must have been REALLY tired (or bored), or likely both, because he sent me a selfie at about 5am yesterday.

Bennett had just woken up and was cuddling with me, so we sent him a selfie right back. I forgot to mention in my haste with the day 12 post, but the boys didn't sleep super awesome because I had a MAJOR mom fail moment the evening before. In the craziness that was that evening, I was trying to get the boys to bed, call Seattle cancer care, and then get the big boys off to the ER. Justin was holding puke bucket and so I was moving the cars around (oh yeah, and prior to all of this-- minor issue that Justin couldn't get Oliver's car started). It was like everything that could go wrong...

So, I walk outside and hear a big movement and THE SMELL. OMG, there is nothing like it. There is a bear. Awesome. So I move the cars and am totally freaked out that this thing is going to eat me (it wouldn't but you know... tension is already high so I'm not thinking clearly). I move the truck and as I turn it off, Justin remote starts it from inside the house as I'm walking back in. AND THEN I DIED RIGHT THERE AFTER PISSING MY PANTS. Actually, I just jumped 10 feet and said a few choice words through the window to him (he, not having known about the BEAR ENCOUNTER and that I was a little on edge). So I go back in as they get to the truck and am in the boys room and he calls me to tell me to dead bolt the front door just in case (he didn't see the bear but smelled it too). To which the kids asked me, and IDIOT THAT I AM, I told them there was a bear outside. And hence they did not sleep great. Mom fail. But we survived.

Meanwhile in the hospital Oliver was able to catch a few ZZZs. They had given him valium the night before which didn't touch his shaking. As Justin had texted me that night: He's bouncing like he was in a freezing lake and there's nothing I can do to stop it." Since the valium at 11pm the night before, he hadn't had any meds, and the dizziness and nausea had dissipated. Only fluids and IV antibiotics. 

I got to the hospital around 10 after picking up some water and coffee for Justin. The poor guy was waiting for a tag team, so someone would be up in case Oliver needed anything. About 2 minutes after I walked in, he took a sip of coffee and allowed himself to crash. Within seconds he was snoring like a rhino (and I do mean that lovingly).

Oliver and Justin both got a nap in and the doctor came in around 11:30. Initially, he mentioned he wanted to keep Oliver there to observe him for "at least a day or two." To which Oliver expressed serious discontent. He was not comfortable and wanted the IV out, wanted to go home. It was the most emotion we had seen out of Oliver in weeks. The doctor had been in communication with Oliver's oncology doctor and said they would monitor him for the afternoon, and maybe with no fever spiking, they could let him go home.

We also had been in communication with SCCA. It is so frustrating as we just felt like we were doing everything we had been told to, and yet he still was in such bad shape- enough that we were not only back in the ER but admitted to the hospital. This email from his doctor's nurse said "you have done nothing wrong." That was comforting.

Another message that I got in this time frame was from one of his friends. With his consent, I wanted to share, as it offered some serious consolation to us yesterday. It read (with some irrelevant details excluded):

Dear Ms. Valente, I just wanted to reach out to you and say some things to you in love. I used to work in a cancer lab and got to interact with a lot of patients who were going through chemo. It is crazy how something that cures you puts you through hell! The nausea, dizziness, no energy, infections, random ER trips, all these things I saw experienced by people who went on to complete remission and a normal life. You guys got this one day at a time, yall are awesome. Secondly, I found out recently that I also have cancer myself. I am on my first cycle of doing chemo as well, 4 days of 4 drugs, 3 days off. It is physical hell. Just to type this took me 2 days. I'm not telling you this to complain, rather to say that people who love and care for you and your family are truly beside you and Oliver in spirit. The nausea, dizziness, frustration, ER trips, I'm right beside yall. If you ever need someone to talk to about Oliver's experiences, whether physical or mental, now you have someone who is there in the trenchs fighting. Keep strong and much love.

There is some comfort, I think, in knowing that the battle is not being fought alone. We were so completely touched by this message, in a way that words won't do justice to describe.

Around 12:30, I left the hospital to run a couple of errands and run home to pick up Colleen. She had gotten a ride back over the mountains for obvious reasons. Shout out to friend Michele, who I know is reading this who took her over Tuesday, then drove her back over yesterday. We could not do this without all of our friends who are giving to us so generously and taking care of US.

We headed straight to the hospital to rejoin Oliver and Justin.

Meanwhile, Owen had an unexpected play date with old buddies. I had gotten a text earlier in the am saying these buds would be around, and I seriously said... you are saving the day right now! (Bennett was in school).

We were not there that long, and at around 3:30pm the doctor came back in and said, I think you can be released now. Oliver perked right up and said, now? Awesome! He had not had a fever all day and we knew what to look for. I headed out to get the kids, and got pictures and texts from Colleen that "Oliver is back!" "Oh my god Jen. The best ever. He saw a bird. And he was so stoked over the bird. He's hungry for life." Followed by: "We are totally leaving. He's so happy he cried in my arms. He said he can't wait to talk. He's chatting a storm up with Justin. Ollie quote: boy what a day! Then he fist bumped me!" I think my response after the past two weeks of a shell of Oliver was "what in the actual fuck! Seriously!!!!"

Pictures from Colleen- you can actually see the light in his eyes!

He came home DANCING! Literally DANCING! Gave us all huge hugs MULTIPLE TIMES. I can't even tell you the weight that was lifted on all of our hearts last night in having OLIVER back. And it turns out, it was all the meds that he was getting that was making him vacant, dizzy, nauseous- the same symptoms we were told these drugs would treat. There is a time and a place for medicine, but at some point, just adding more and more meds may not be the solution. He is truly sensitive to them, and without any of them in his system, he was BACK.

 

He was out and among us and ACTUALLY on his PHONE! The first time he had touched it in almost two weeks.

Of course, invited Lexi over promptly.

Ate dinner with us- a burger. THIS IS SO GOOD.

Face timing with big brother bailey. At this point he said "what's up thug life?" We were all in a total state of disbelief. While his counts are still low and there is some concern there, the meds were what was making HIM be "gone." Obviously some chemo has an impact, and we are not ignorant to think that things will be smooth sailing, but we are happy to have solved at least some of the puzzle.

Even Bennett got in on the dancing- the floss!

Face timing with buddy Nick as well!

And finally able to read all of the mail he has gotten.

There were a LOT of hugs last night. A lot of sentiment: "this was all due to the meds? Holy crap."

And a LOT of dancing.

We know we are still in for a fight. It's STILL an epic battle. We know there will be some more peaks and valleys. But this, this gave us hope. Hope that the best is yet to come. Hope that we are on the right path. Hope in the journey. Hope that we all HAD, but tenfold because we saw the piece in him again that showed us life and hope, and kicking cancer's ass.  But the most important piece, is that the warrior fighting it all has some relief and feels like himself. He is willing and ready to fight, and will dance the whole dang way. Even on the bad days, when he can't speak and may seem like a shell again, we know that at some point, he will come out of the fog with hugs and amazing dance moves. #oliverstrong.