For anyone who is married, does it annoy you when someone writes something or refers to you as "Mrs (your husband's first name) (your husband's last name)?" It drives me absolutely insane. I. despise. it. with. a. passion. HELLO! I AM NOT Mrs. Tim Richards. You can call me Mrs. Jenn Richards, Mrs. Jennifer Richards, Jenn, Jennifer, JR, butthead, whatever. ANYTHING but Mrs. Tim Richards. I hate that. Hate it. Did I mention I hate it?
To me it is so offensive. I get so annoyed by it. I think the tradition of it stems back to when women were considered to be almost property of their husbands. And they probably were very proud and flattered to be called Mrs. So and So. I am proud to be married to Tim. I took his last name (I didn't HAVE TO!) Doesn't taking someone else's last name mean enough? I feel that by referring to me as Mrs. Tim Richards, I am not really my own person. If it isn't bad, why isn't he called Mr. Jennifer Baker? Ha, seems to me like most guys would wet their PANTS if that happened. How hard is it to write MY first name or refer to me as JENN? I know it really isn't that big of a deal and I shouldn't get my panties into a wad because of it but it really just urks me. I can't understand how if it is NOT a big deal, why are people STILL referring to me as Mrs. Tim Richards? JUST WRITE MY NAME! It is ME they are addressing, put MY flipping name...how hard is it?
We ran into this issue when we were doing our wedding invitations. We wrote my parents individual names. (IE: Mr. and Mrs. (dad's first name) and (mom's first name) (joint last name)). But my mom actually WANTED to be Mrs. (my dad's first name) (my dad's last name). You can imagine the jaw dropping that occured on my part. I know that it's just a generational difference but I just can't understand it. And when people address me as that or refer to me as that or worse even, INTRODUCE me as that, I just want to scream. Lately I've received several things addressed to Mrs. Tim Richards which is why I'm so particularly annoyed by it right now...perhaps the next piece of mail I get addressed this way I should return to the sender and write on the envelope that no such person exists. Mrs. Tim Richards...who's that? So, maybe I am being a little bit anal but I despise being referred to as something that I'm not. I am an individual, Tim is an individual. We married so now we have the same LAST name. Not first...apparently some people think I took his first name too. But I don't really think I look or act like a Tim, do you?
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2 comments:
I know what you mean. I still haven't changed my name with the social security office. I really need to do it, but I even feel weird having Johnson as a last name even. I really should have gotton over it by now! Sometimes I don't mind getting mail address to Mrs Travis Johnson because I feel like I am kinda annonymous that way... I guess I am getting used to it. Our grandmothers would think we are crazy!
Butthead?
One man I know actually took his wife's name when they married and hyphenated it to have a new last name. All the women in the office considered him a hero.
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