A lot of people have asked us why we used midwives for the birth of our baby. In fact, I think we've both gotten our fair share of feedback on using midwives, and I can't say that it's been all positive. In fact, I think most people think we're insane. Maybe we are. Crazy hippies, check! Just living up to the expectation.
Anyway, the feedback ranged from a blank stare and a "what's that mean?" to a "WOW" and a quick head turn, to "that's awesome, but I could NEVER do that" to "You should just schedule a C-section!", to "Well, I GUESS, if that's your choice, just make sure you at least make them give you the drugs." I didn't really think it was that weird to attempt to do a non-hospital birth when we decided to do it. And by deciding to do it, I mean there really was no decision other than WHO to choose and WHERE to go as our midwives. I always knew I wanted a natural birth (people have been doing this for millions of years, right?) and Justin's education comes from a very homeopathic, natural based center. Additionally, his first two kids were born in the hospital with less than dismal experiences each time so he knew that there was something better out there too. To seal the nail in the coffin, I had a pretty irritating experience with my western doc OB-GYN when I first found out I was pregnant which just made me realize that there was no way in hell I was going to experience this NORMAL experience with her (or any other OB) all the way. Oh yeah, and don't forget, we are just your every day crazy hippies....
Quick and clear sidenote: OF COURSE if something happened we would have gone to a hospital. OF COURSE if there was an emergency situation we would be in a hospital. [Not idiots. And also, this is why OB's are trained in surgeries... and also, most birth do not end in situations like this]
So, pre-baby, we assumed we would have a low risk birth and all would be completely ok. As such, we debated our options which were 1) Hospital birth with a midwife 2) Stand alone birth center birth with a midwife 3) Home birth with a midwife. We quickly eliminated #1. Why? Because hospital midwives are still under severe direction of doctors so most hospital based midwife births we read about did not end up being the type of birth we really truly wanted. So were left with choices #2 and #3. We met with who were going to become our midwives and eventually decided on option #2 for several reasons. The first reason was that our house is a little hard to get to. If we were to do a home birth and I were to need transport to the hospital, it would take a bit of time. If we were to do the birth at the birth center, we'd be a block away from a hospital just in case. The second reason is that we REALLY liked our group of midwives (there are 3 of them). The third reason was that I really didn't know how messy it would get in a home birth and if that would be terrible to clean up. So, we made choice #2. Easy.
But why midwives? Is the question that I always get asked. Followed by: "why would you want to risk it? SO MUCH COULD GO WRONG... Just go to the hospital." OR, "Aren't you going to want drugs?"
I won't go into the specifics and details and statistics that support the reason why I am a firm believer in natural birthing but I will say that there is ample support and evidence out there for it, and against the present day "normal" hospital births...and that anyone who wants to hear it can reach out to me and I will be able to talk to you for hours on end and refer you to a bunch of reading material on the subject. I will say that the c-section rate has tripled in the United States in the past 25years and it's been proven that much of that has to do with drugs that are now commonly associated with what is becoming the "norm" for labor in the US (pitocin to induce, epidural to manage pain). True, necessary c-sections are a rarity in this country, the majority of c-sections if we boiled them down would probably not be necessary, especially if we are looking in comparison to other countries who have just as many births that have c-section rates of about 12% versus ours of about 30%. I did not want to have a "fear" about birth which is so often instilled by OB's... IE: your baby is too big, your pelvis is all wrong, your fluids are too low, you have to be induced now, and then you need a c-section only to find out after the fact that it probably would have all been ok. If there was a cord prolapse or something seriously medically WRONG, a c-section is the only way to go but unfortunately, c-sections these days are more cases of drug interference, not letting the body/baby work for women, and convenience for both families who want to schedule when their babies are born as well as doctors who want to do the same.
Justin and I wanted to try this all naturally knowing that MY ancestors for millions of years before me were able to do it that way. Based on what I've read, babies head sizes and amniotic fluid levels have not changed that significantly from even 40 years ago but those are two main reasons that c-sections are given. Aside from not wanting to be thrust into a situation we were not comfortable with that could very well likely end in a birth that was less than we wanted, we wanted to put me into a situation where both he and I could more readily control the outcome. Of course, as with all births, control has to be completely surrendered but I wanted to put myself into a situation where my body would be allowed to do that in whatever means necessary (whether that means in a birthing tub, on a birthing ball, on my hands and knees, or hell, standing on my head). I wanted to be able to move around as freely as possible during active labor and to be able to eat throughout labor. I did not want to be restricted by the rules and regulations that so often come along with birthing in hospitals (IE: no eating, you have to be monitored which restricts movement, come in as SOON as your water breaks which often is not necessary, having someone tell me when to push when my body didn't yet feel the NEED to push, etc).
Aside from wanting a labor that would allow my body to work for ME versus someone else telling me what to do, I wanted to allow the baby the best possible entry into this world (ASSUMING, of course, that he was fine and would not need urgent medical care. That would of course change the game). Many hospitals take the baby directly away from the mom following labor, cut the cord and clean he/she up. I know that some hospitals are starting to go away from this and are starting to put the baby directly on the mom, leave the cord intact until it stops pulsing, and wait to bathe he/she but not all abide by this. With midwives we already were understood in this respect. It's also understood by the midwives (as it is their practice) that the first hour after birth is dedicated to the bonding between parents/baby, establishing breast feeding, etc. They allow the placenta to be delivered in the time that it happens (versus yanking on the cord to get it to come out) and then only after the mom is cleaned up and the family has had bonding time, do they take the baby to do all the vitals, etc. Then 4 hours later after the family's "high" has worn down, they are sent home to their own bed to sleep.
Again, there are a myriad of reasons that we choose this way to birth and I could go on about them forever with more substantial evidence BUT, I know it's a controversial subject. I know people live and breathe western doctors (prime example: my mom and I could not disagree on my choice of birth more... or really how I treat anything medically versus how she does). I truly believe in the power of western medicine and I believe that it is there for a good reason. BUT. If it's not necessary, I don't think it has to be utilized, especially for something that is so truly PRIMAL and NORMAL as birthing. At the end of the day the only really important thing is that we have a healthy mom and a healthy baby but, in the best case scenario, we chose the option that would utilze our end goal with pleasant results in between.
A couple of pictures from our birthing center- this is one of the 3 suites:
